May nakita akong FB post “We all once had ‘the one that got away.‘ ”
If I have read this post a long time ago, I would empathically say “Apir!” or “I fully agree <insert emoticon or explexitive statement>!!!”
But now, the age of 33 (now turning 34), I beg to disagree. I would like to suggest/edit– maybe, the one that “wasn’t right for you.” Back in 2009, I’ve written a blog entry where I expressed the desire to love in a “painful, but, liberating way,” Now, I look back, and I believe I did. I was just too blind to accept then that the constructs related to “love” is pain and happiness (or ecstasy). when you feel ecstatic, you will also feel hurt.
Anyway, back to my argument. To me, the logic is simple. When you love, there is no shit like you don’t give it all. At that perfect moment and time, you have exhausted your means to give it all. It was, that time, your BEST.
And your BEST could not be under or overrated. It’s “as is, where is.” At that right moment, it was the optimal effort you could give.
But maybe, that “optimal” effort did not fit into that exact time and space. If you are to think, “Maybe I should have been more ______, less _______,” I think that won’t be applicable, because, simply, it was all you could ever give. Sure, the next day, you could be a little more of this or less of that; but that would only prolong the agony. You’ll come back to a full cycle of things. Until it becomes a vicious cycle, and it ends up, anyway, you just kept it longer.
That’s why there are things like “Carpe Diem,” or “Live like it’s your last day on earth.” Because you don’t have to die to see the end of things; A moment simply fades, a day simply ends. That’s why when we love, we give our optimal effort, we give all, and we are capable expressing such love. It’s just that, we spent it out to the wrong person or situation.
So, my take home message is that, you don’t regret the things you didn’t do or should have done differently; you just have to accept that things aren’t just meant to be. Or it could be that you were a victim of your choices. And the lessons learnt can be applied to the next situation you’ll get yourself into; it’s up to you how you’ll make use out of your life lessons.
But you don’t give up on love. Never give up on love.
Happy Valentine’s Day from Myanmar. Yeah, I’m still single-handedly celebrating it, but, what the heck, I’m happier now. Because I choose to be.