When ATM goes wrong and it’s Monday

My friend, Sharlene and I just got into IRRI months ago (well, as for me, last month). Me, ever so excited to finally get an on time salary (that is, at the 15th; at IRRI, you can even get it on the 14th). It gives a seemingly eternal bliss to get your paycheck ON TIME, for someone like me who defines on time as at most 5 days after the payday.

Well, that’s what I thought for the first month of my stay. I’m now on the second month, about to receive my third paycheck. Although we have our own ATM unit inside the Institute, the machine goes on a hibernating mode WHEN IT’S ABOUT TIME and when you’ve got baryables left on your pocket.

So my friend Sha wanted to withdraw cash from the machine this morning, but, because it’s five days before payday, the ATM went on a hibernating mode again; or, I’d say, it slipped into coma. Oblivious to the forthcoming fury of x number of IRRI employees.

So what else will be left for us, Purita Mirasols, the cash strapped society of IRRI? Sha and I agreed that the notice board should be at least made creative; don’t limit it to the “machine unavailable” or “OFFLINE” only. There are several options to say that, simply, we have to remain cash strapped. Maybe the management can try any of the following next time it bogs down:

Machine recuperating

Machine moving on

Machine fixing a broken heart (insert a dead man with superimposed crying heart)

Mga pobre, uwi!

Ayaw niyo ba ng aking puri? Pera lang ba talaga ang hanap niyo sa akin?

Machine hesitating

Machine in identity crisis (hindi niya alam kung siya ba ay talagang offline o sira na talaga)

“Bro, sana po magkapera na ang sambayanang IRRI-Santino”

Emo mode

Machine in Coma; talk to it while you can, it can hear you, though

From IRRI Employee to ATM: Flat line na nga ang puso ko, pati ba naman ang wallet ko?

In case of worst case scenario, what will be left of us is to bring crown of flowers to this poor ATM machine with a phrase that reads “It will take a lifetime for us to be okay-alaala ng mga empleyado ng IRRI”

There you go,  more suggestions are welcome. The next time we pass by the IRRI ATM, we know what to post, at least to insert craziness in a hectic day. It’s another Manic Monday,  that may overspill throughout the week.  I have to stretch my less-than five hundred moolah until payday.

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